I am just ready to be warm and go for walks outside in a t-shirt. I'm ready to plant my garden and set up the patio furniture. I'm ready to watch Gavin chase the dogs around outside and teach him to kick a soccer ball. I'm ready to put away the dutch ovens and break out the barbeque. I'm ready for winter to be OVER!!!
I think I'm going to paint my bathroom this week. It's a dark coffee color right now and I feel like it just drags me down further into my March gloom. I think I'd like a pretty shade of blue and some green plants. I need to wake up to a more cheerful atmosphere.
I have also come to the realization that I'm going to need to buck up and get a job pretty soon. I am having such a difficult time figuring out what I want to do. I have a new idea daily, yet, I have never felt less ambitious. I am not sure how to feel about a loss of ambition. I think it is sort of dangerous territory but yet freeing at the same time. I have really enjoyed my time home with Gavin and have no regrets about quitting my job. At the same time, I like working and connecting with people. I try to evaluate my skill-set and then search for jobs that compliment. I have been debating becoming a pilates teacher but don't know if I just like doing pilates for my own well-being; would I enjoy teaching it? Should I go back into banking? I must have enjoyed the field considering I spent so much time in it. My latest thought was to go get my teaching certificate and become a high school teacher- my original plan when I chose Western Washington University eleven years ago. I am seriously all over the place. I know I'm not alone in this struggle. There are many people out there, and I suspect some of my blog readers, that feel the same way. What do we want to be when we grow up? Or is it simply that careers are overrated?
Anyhow, this is why the month of March drives me nuts- I always end up spending too much time in my head. It's quite ridiculous. I think for now, I will go for a run and clear my head. I will paint my bathroom and buy some kind of live plant. I will open all the blinds and try to let more light in. Spring is coming.